Internet Literacy and You.

Uncle Sam Wants YOU to be Internet Literate!

I write a fair amount about media literacy on this blog. It’s a topic I consider myself to be fairly knowledgeable about. I also have a professional background in SEO (search engine optimization), which means that I have a solid enough grasp of how the Internet works and how pieces of information make it to each person’s browser. That being said, after watching this nine minute TED talk, I realized I’ve had my head in the sand about some critical shifts in the ways information is delivered to each net denizen. This is disconcerting both as a consumer of Internet information and as a parent striving to teach media literacy to my young children. I’m grateful to now be aware of the ways in which people are getting dramatically different information on the Internet and how the algorithmic calculation of information distribution is totally invisible to the end user. As my children get older and begin to use the Internet as the incredible information gathering tool it is, I will be able to help them be more critical consumers of what they discover.

I feel like I’m gumming up the message and importance of understanding filters, personalization and Internet literacy. Fortunately, TED presenter Eli Pariser does a far better job, explaining it very simply and compellingly. Take nine minutes to watch this video. I promise you will be grateful you did. It will probably be the best thing you’ve ever experienced on the Internet. Well, except maybe the insanity test.

TED Talk on YouTube (posted by WikiLeaks… I’m still not sure how I feel about them)

Here’s the link to the video on the TED site:

http://www.ted.com/talks/eli_pariser_beware_online_filter_bubbles.html

And here’s Eli’s website, where you can find loads more information about the Filter:

http://www.thefilterbubble.com/

Finally, if you are looking for resources to learn more about media literacy, check out the unbranding section here.

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I’m Too Pretty to Do Homework.

Aaah yes, this is the message I want to send our daughters. Reminds me of the “Polite as a Princess” book… only so much worse.

JC Penney CEO Mike Ullman is too pretty to do homework

JC Penney is selling a jersey shirt that reads “I’m too pretty to do homework so my brother has to do it for me.” The description reads “Who has time for homework when there’s a new Justin Bieber album out? She’ll love this tee that’s just as cute and sassy as she is.” I suspect that the item will be yanked from the site within hours***, as news of the offensive shirt is hopping across the internet – mostly thanks to a great catch by Pigtail Pals‘ Melissa Wardy. The sweatshirt, which comes in sizes 7-16, is on sale for only $9.99, so if you act now, you too can own this fabulous piece of evidence of culturally condoned misogyny.

***as of 9:08 AM, 8/31/11, the shirt was no longer showing up for sale on the US version of the site. It was still available in the UK and Ireland and probably elsewhere.

JC Penney can shove it.

If, on the other hand, you’d like to let JC Penney know where it’s at and where they can shove this shirt (see example above), feel free to call 972-431-8200 to speak to a person at  JC Penney’s “Customer Concerns” line. When I called at 8:21 AM PST on 8/31/11, the woman I spoke to stated that the company was aware of the issue with the shirt and was preparing to pull it down off the site. If you’d like to go further up the food chain, I’m encourage you to drop a line on over to CEO and Chairman of the Board Myron E. (Mike) Ullman, III. I called the corporate headquarters and asked for Mike Ullman. I was put through to the customer concerns line again, but I know that the company has now gotten two calls at two different lines to voice my issue. Mike, who has four sons and two daughters and whose significant work with Mercy Ships should make him far more culturally aware than this serious misstep by his company indicates, can be found at:

Mike Ullman, III
Chief Executive Officer
J.C. Penney, Inc.
6501 Legacy Drive
Plano, TX 54024

(972) 431-1000

I'm too pretty to do homework so my brother has to do it for me

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A Roundup of Recent Articles on Unethical Marketing to Children

The Corporate Babysitter blog has a great round up of recent news stories about unethical marketing to children. If you’d like to get familiar with the problem of childhood branding, this is a great place to start: http://www.parentsforethicalmarketing.org/blog/2011/06/06/concerns-over-unethical-marketing-to-kids-grow/

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Disney Attacking Maternity Wards

If you’d like more information about why Disney is evil, check out the documentary, Mickey Mouse Monopoly.

For more information on media awareness, look at the resources in the Unbranding section of this blog.

This is for all y’all who might think I’m a potential tinfoil hat society member for my thoughts on protecting my children from marketing ploys. According to this New York Times article, representatives of Disney’s new “DisneyBaby” line have been making the rounds at maternity wards. Here are some choice quotes and snippets:

“This is taking advantage of families at an extremely vulnerable time,” said Jeff McIntyre, director of national policy for the advocacy group Children Now.

“If ever there was an opportunity for a trusted brand to enter a market and provide a better product and experience, it’s this,” said Robert A. Iger, chief executive of Disney. “I’m extremely excited about it.”

How do you spell evil? I say I-G-E-R.

…the company gains access to the maternity hospitals through a company called Our365, a business that sells bedside baby pictures. Our365 pays hospitals for exclusive access, and companies like Disney pay Our365 to promote their own products. Our365 also has Fisher-Price and Procter & Gamble as clients. It is unclear whether mothers know of Our365’s financial ties to these companies.

No – they don’t – I know this for a fact because both times while I’ve been in hospital having babies, this junk has been passed off to me under the premise that it’s related to healthy baby raising.

A representative visits a new mother and offers a free Disney Cuddly Bodysuit, a variation of the classic Onesie. In bedside demonstrations, the bilingual representatives extol the product’s bells and whistles — extra soft! durable! better sizing! — and ask mothers to sign up for e-mail alerts from DisneyBaby (link removed ~ Mamá Leche).

“Apparel is only a beachhead,” said Andy Mooney, chairman of Disney Consumer Products. Also planned are bath items, strollers, baby food and an abundance of other products — all pushed with so much marketing muscle that Disney Baby may actually dent operating margins in Mr. Mooney’s division in the near term. But this is a long-term play, and it could have its greatest value far beyond the crib.

“To get that mom thinking about her family’s first park experience before her baby is even born is a home run,” Mr. Mooney said, adding that a surprisingly large number of families do not become consumers of Disney products until their children reach preschool age, when they start to watch Disney Channel programs like “Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.”

Really? A surprisingly large number? We are well into preschool age with our children and have seen hide nor hair of Disney in our house. Sadly, even Winnie the Pooh has been compromised. I really like that f-ing bear.

How do you spell evil? I also spell it M-O-O-N-E-Y.

Rachel Bernstein, an obstetrician-gynecologist in Fort Lauderdale, Fla., who is pregnant herself, said she was concerned about marketers using hospitals as customer hunting grounds. “But Disney is a nice company,” she said, “and I think my patients would actually be thrilled to get free Disney stuff.”

Can you say “Stockholm Syndrome?” Hello Patty Hearst! You are completely inculcated into the cult of Disney. The mass media assault works.

Elizabeth Carter gave birth to her daughter Olivia on Jan. 19 in Piedmont, Calif., and was given a Disney Cuddly Bodysuit as part of an Our365 photo package. “It surprised me that Disney was in there promoting something right as the baby was born, but we figured as new parents we weren’t in a position to turn free things down,” she said.

Mrs. Carter put the garment on her hours-old baby immediately. “And I have to say Olivia looked fabulous, much better than the rough, bulky thing the hospital had her wearing,” she said.

Piedmont, for those of you not in the know, is an extremely affluent area. Perhaps I’m wrong, but I equate affluence with education and education with awareness. Shame on the parent with no excuse to be so blind to this blight.

As for me, I’m happy to wear a tin foil hat, if that means keeping my family away from this stuff.

For more info, check out the section on Unbranding.

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In Defense of a Slow Childhood

When I was in my twenties, I spent a stint of time as a dog walker. I loved the job, since it gave me a reasonable excuse to be outside in every type of weather and I really like the company of dogs. One day, it was storming like crazy in San Francisco, where I worked. I was concerned about the wind whipping branches out of trees and killing me or the dogs, so we went to the beach for our outing. We were at Chrissy Field, just inside the bay from the Golden Gate bridge. Almost as soon as we hit the beach, I heard this incredible rumbling out on the bay. The storm was so thick that you couldn’t see more than 30 feet out into the water – it was just a whitewash of gusting rain. At first I thought the rumbling was a distressed tanker in the bay and suddenly I realized it was a gale force wind — literally a wall of wind flying from the ocean, under the Golden Gate Bridge and slamming across the surface of the water towards us. The dogs were all standing a bit in front of me and I knew I had to protect them. I squatted down and screamed out to them over the storm while unzipping my raincoat, my back to the bridge where the wind was coming from. I opened my jacket just in time to create a pocket of still space in front of me. The dogs, lowering their heads facing the wind, inched into the pocket just as the gale rushed over us. One of the smaller dogs got picked up in the wind and tossed a few times along the sand. We, meaning the other dogs and I, moved like a phalanx in the wind, keeping the cover of the jacket spread wide like wings, until we could catch up with Charlie. We stayed like that for a good fifteen minutes until the gusts stopped and everything got quiet again. The sun broke out over a still, grey air and we looked at each other, stunned and thrilled at the same time that we’d managed through that experience together.

I recount that story because it makes me think of the way in which I want to spread my wings over my children, creating a sheltering pocket for them from all the speed and racing, media and technology that waits with bated breath just outside the door. I don’t think all technology and media are evil, but that there’s a time and place for them. In the same way that it takes an adult to appreciate a wine, so too does it take a fully mature mind to be able to handle the speed of common life today. I’d rather under-expose my children to technology and media than over-expose them. They way I see it, I have always figured that if they want to be media savvy and live a fast-paced life, they can always catch up as young adults. It’s not like you can’t pick up technology and adaptively use it in your life — that’s the very nature of technology — it’s meant to make your life faster and easier.

I recently read a fantastic guest post by Esa Helttula at the “Moms with Apps” blog. It’s entitled “Let the Children Play.” It’s ironic that a techno-focused blog would post something this profound in justification of unplugging your life and your children.

Esa illuminates some of the outcomes that result from a deficiency in play, especially unstructured, outdoor play, in our children. Apparently it’s a global phenomenon. I instinctively strive to give my children what I call a “Slow Childhood.” This means minimizing obligations to a hyper-scheduled life and providing lots of unstructured play time, focusing on toys that require imagination and interaction to make them function (ie, generally not things that light up and go “whiz-bang!”). One of Esa’s points that struck home with me was the need for children to create games that are based on their rules. This isn’t about being in power, but in play-acting the structures that they encounter every day which are rarely explicitly declared, but upon which we base most of our society. It must be very confusing for children to comprehend the norms of introduction between adults, or the art of navigating the rules of traffic! By being able to play-act and create games that fluidly shift rules and dynamics, children can experiment with the social structures they encounter and come to master them through play.

Another aspect that jumped out was that which relates to elaboration:

The most striking decline was in Elaboration (ability to develop and elaborate upon ideas and detailed and reflective thinking and motivation to be creative). Scores in Elaboration decreased by over 36 % from 1984 to 2008.

I started wondering who else is thinking about the idea of a Slow Childhood and came across this beautiful post on “A Wild and Precious Life.” This homeschooling mom commends Last Child in the Woods: Saving our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder by Richard Louv. I think I’ll add it to the list and start looking for more ways to build on this idea of spreading my wings to create the space, protecting my children from the gale force winds of technology and the pace of modern life so I may give them the gift of a Slow Childhood.

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Media and Body Image for Girls

Check out the resource guide on princesses and fairy tales.

It gives some options for directing “princess passion” away from Disney misogyny and includes great information about media awareness for girls.

Image used under Creative Commons Licensing, attributed to iboy_daniel

There’s an interesting post that made the WordPress.com home page today about some young girls in Beirut. The post is about the “whitening effect” related to race and how some cultures are pretty upfront about preferring lighter skin – so much so that they openly advertise skin lightening products. At one point, the blogger conveys how much “white” is preferred and how it’s exemplified by her young pupils who have taken to playing a Disney Princess game where they can create their own version of a princess. Though they hem and haw over details like clothes and hair, they reflexively choose the “white” skin color on the princesses.

Since I already have an axe to grind about Disney Princesses, this post practically leapt off the screen for me. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to notice that media influences self-image and that there’s considerable cause for alarm, especially as it relates to children. Boys and girls are limited by media influence, but I’m more concerned about my daughter than my son because the majority of roles portrayed for girls and women in media are that of supporters and objects, not leaders and protagonists. Some day, when I have more time I’ll get into the boy part, but the girl part has me for now. Part of it is that, when it comes to girl physiques, all types come with their risks — stereotypically attractive girls will be objectified and sexualized as they mature, more physically challenged girls will hold themselves in comparison.

As a mom, I’m driven to creating a sense of inner character and beauty in both of my children, male and female. In order to do this, I think it’s important to keep them from the dominant media culture as much as possible, as long as possible (they’re both <4 yrs old right now).This especially applies to the cabalesque influence of the Disney Princess regime and the Barbie empire. Both of the aforementioned perpetuate unrealistic physiques for girls and shuttle them into cattle shoots the feed the girls into cookie cutter versions of who they should become. This may sound extreme, but if you doubt my mentality, take a few days to breeze through Packaging Girlhood. It makes a pretty good case for the fact that there genuine intent in the crafting of marketing schemes to produce ultimate consumers. Or read this wonderful letter petitioning Pixar to create an un-Disney movie with a female protagonist to get a sense of the need for more.

When I try to discuss this subject with other adults, I’m surprised at how often my concerns are met with an attitude of “what’s the big deal? You’re taking things way to seriously.” or “You’re overthinking things.” Really? Am I? Take a moment to look at these short videos produced by Dove. Sure, it’s just another take on a media campaign, a fresh spin, but at least they’re pointing out something that’s deadly serious.

Watch the videos and then ask yourself if you still think the influence of media on girls’ body images is benign. Tell me there’s not something to be worked up about.

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Teaching My Three Year Old About Money: Saving

As I noted in the previous post, my daughter is starting to develop a concept of money. She understands that you spend money to get things and that there are different amounts of money. She also understands that you need more money to pay for some things than others. As I’ve written, I’ve started developing a strategy for teaching her about spending habits – that you need to consider your purchase carefully and fully comprehend that once you buy something, you have less money to use to buy something else.

This weekend, a family friend gave our daughter a homemade wallet which was crafted out of duct tape. My daughter was thrilled! The first thing she said was that she needed a purse to put it into. The second thing she said was that she needed money to put in it. My husband gladly pulled a dollar out of his wallet and put it in hers. She immediately turned to me gleefully and said, “Mommy, can we go to the museum tomorrow so I can buy something else?” (the local children’s museum is where she made her first purchase).

I realized this, too, was a teachable moment. I responded, “Yes, sure, if you want to we can do that – we can go to the museum and spend your dollar, if you want.” “YAY!!!,” was her response. I continued, “However, if you want, you might consider putting your dollar into your piggy bank. If you put your dollar into the piggy bank, then every day it stays there, you’ll get a new penny.”

We had to review the logic of this several times. Up until this moment, I don’t think she was aware she had a piggy bank. I took the beautiful Eastern European clay painted pig down from a shelf in the living room and showed it to her. I explained that when we save our money in a bank, we get more money. After a review of the situation, she decided, at least for the night, to put her dollar in the piggy bank. I made a big deal of congratulating her on a great decision and showed her how to fold the dollar to fit in the slot.

The subject of the dollar has come up a few times and I’ve reminded her about the pennies. I put a penny in every day, but I usually do it at night. I don’t want her to think it’s like the tooth fairy or anything else magical, just that it’s not about money coming from Mommy and Daddy. I want her to understand that this is just what happens when you save your money – you get more.

Sometime down the road she’ll remember the dollar and decide she wants to buy something and I think that’s great. I just hope enough time will have gone by for there to be a meaningful amount of pennies in the bank so when we withdraw the dollar, she can see that her money has grown!

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Teaching My Three Year Old About Money: Spending

The subject of money has recently come up for my daughter. A while back, she got a hold of a dollar bill. I think we were headed to a special event and I gave her the dollar so she could buy whatever treat she wanted, as long as she could afford it. Obviously she doesn’t understand the value of a dollar, but, as the day progressed, she forgot all about the dollar in her pocket and she never spent it.

Fast forward six months and she came across her dollar in her bedside table drawer. We were headed to a children’s museum and she decided she wanted to buy something. I thought it would be a great lesson for her. After we were done with the museum, we went into the gift shop and perused the aisles of small tchackis. She was tempted by many things, but almost all of them cost more than a dollar – $1.50 $1.25, etc. I just kept explaining to her that she didn’t have enough money and we kept looking for things that did cost a dollar. Finally we discovered a small rubber duck, some stickers and a miniature watercolor paint set. She carefully chose the paint set. I reminded her that once she paid for it, she would have the paint set, but wouldn’t have the dollar. Was she sure she wanted to do that?

After much thought, she determined that she wanted the paint set. I congratulated her on a great purchase and assured her she’d love painting with it (to keep the lesson simple, I paid for the tax). As soon as we got in the car she told me she wanted another dollar and I told her that wasn’t how it worked – she only got money on special occasions. A few times since this incident, she’s asked for money and asked me to buy unnecessary toys. I’ve reminded her that we don’t have the money for things like that right now, but when she has some money she can choose how to spend it.

I don’t mean to be draconian with her, but I want to inculcate her to an understanding of the seriousness of money early on. Soon enough she’ll be surrounded by peers with their own fluid grasps of how money works so, while I’ve got her mostly to myself I want to instill these values.

She loves her paint set and she’s quite proud of it.

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New Lunch Idea for Littles = PB and Banana Grilled Sandwiches!

A while back, I wrote about being a one-trick lunch pony. We have quesadillas every day. Even though they’re delightfully tasty, they’re super fattening and I’m ready for a change.. I just wish my children were as keen on something else…

I’ve finally encountered a few new ideas for lunch, like grilled peanut butter and banana sandwiches, noted on Wholesome Toddler Food.

PEANUT BUTTER & BANANA GRILLED SANDWICH

This is super simple. Just butter one side of two slices of bread, slather some peanut butter on the other side (or sunbutter if there are allergies) and lay in some thinly sliced bananas. Set it in a pan and flip when the bread on the first side is toasty. When the second side is toasty, you’re done! Cut into quarters so there’s more finger-food to go around.

Also, Alli ‘n Son has these waffle sandwiches which looks really good as a breakfast, lunch or snack and so simple.

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Shut Up and Parent Better

Photo used by Creative Commons license, by Seq on Flickr

Me, not you. I would never tell you to shut up.

I’m reading this book that I feel was divinely sent to me. I ordered it on Amazon, so I know little book elves didn’t magically ferret it under my pillow one night. I still feel it was handed down from on-high (take your pick which mountain or deity) because it is helping me so much during this latest parenting crisis!

The book, Love, Limits and Lessons by Bill Corbett is quite slender with large type. It’s an easy read with quite simple ideas, some of which I’ve heard or read before but haven’t figured out how to reflexively apply, others being completely new to me.

This evening, at dinner, I focused on Corbett’s tactic of silence. He mentions the power of silence for a few situations – when seeking compliance about something a child is supposed to do, as well as to reward a child with 100% attention. I can’t explain it as eloquently as he does (obviously – look at the title of this post!), so I’ll just leave it to him. Get the book!!! I will say that I had the most amazing time with my two young children. My son, 23 months, never sits still for meals and eats almost nothing. Tonight, without saying a word, I managed to get him to eat most of his meal just by gently redirecting him back to his seat (and sitting 8 inches from him) and saying “eat” or just pointing at his food. I got no push-back from him.

My daughter, at 3.5 years, can be quite a handful – a total bundle of energy and sprite, rolled in with the greatest stubborn streak and desire to rule the world. She also never, ever, stops talking as long as she’s awake and she almost always talks IN A FULL SHOUT LIKE SHE’S IN ALL CAPS MODE ALL THE TIME. Tonight, just by being 100% present with her and giving her very minimal verbal response, she was lovely and calm at dinner. I felt like this was one of the first dinners I could breathe through.

Thank you Bill Corbett!!!

If you want to know more about Corbett’s work, here’s his site: http://billcorbett.vpweb.com/default.html and, more importantly, here’s his blog with some wonderful parenting articles on it.

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